520: 5 Ways to Stop People-Pleasing and Be Your Authentic Self


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Episode Summary

Your true self is the authentic, pure essence of who you were before the world taught you to become someone else.

Today, I’m talking about what the true self really is and how we can begin reconnecting with it. When we are born, we come in with our true essence. But as we grow up, we begin adapting, changing, and creating a false self so we can feel loved, accepted, safe, and like we belong.

Over time, this false self can cover up the truth of who we really are. We may lose touch with what we feel, what we need, what nourishes us, and what helps us feel connected to ourselves. But the good news is that anyone can begin to rediscover and live from their true self.

In this episode, I’m sharing five simple ways to reconnect with your true self: getting in touch with your emotions, tuning into your needs, practicing self-care, using breathwork, and journaling. These practices help us slow down, listen inward, and begin claiming the parts of ourselves we may have hidden, forgotten, or pushed away.

Key Takeaways

  • The true self is your authentic self, the pure essence of who you were born as

  • The false self develops as we adapt to feel safe, loved, accepted, and like we belong

  • Many of us disconnect from our emotions because we were never taught how to feel them

  • Reconnecting with your emotions helps you access deeper parts of yourself

  • Your needs are different from your wants, and learning to identify them is essential

  • Asking for what you need is part of living from your true self

  • Self-care is not selfish. It is self-loving

  • Practicing self-care supports self-worth and helps you reconnect with who you really are

  • Breathwork can help release stuck emotions and take you deeper into yourself

  • Journaling helps you access your unconscious mind, higher self, and deeper inner wisdom

  • Rediscovering your true self happens through awareness, validation, and small daily practices

The True Self

The true self is the authentic essence of who you are beneath the layers of protection, conditioning, fear, and adaptation. In The Adult Chair, the true self is the pure, unwounded part of us that existed before we began changing ourselves to gain love, approval, safety, or belonging.

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519: How to Process Negative Emotions Without Getting Stuck